January 13, 2010

I used to think of my car rides with just my mom as a television or Internet show called Road Rage. Because even as a small child I was brilliant.

But those rides are really fun, unless you know, they aren't. Some how they always end up funny though. Today was particularly hilarious.

Me- 'I think I would probably end up writing the next Family Guy, not the next Gossip Girl,'
Mama- 'Yeah, your much more likely to write Family Guy stuff,'
Me- 'I would always want things to turn out like right in Gossip Girl, it would be crap, nothing would be interesting,'
Mama- 'I could see your blog becoming a sitcom,'
Me- 'But I couldn't play myself!'
Mama- 'No, someone else would have to play you. Well, you know who would play me, Whoopi Goldberg,'
Me- Laughing,'Oh right, I see that, who would play me?
Mama-'Your harder, um a younger version of the girl in Legally Blond,'
Me- 'Reese Witherspoon really? Not like Abigal Breslin or Daokota Fanning or something,'
Mama-'There too serious, they don't do that bu bu dumb thing going on,'
Me- 'And I do? No, I would be Jennifer Love Hewitt, obviously,'
Mama- 'I don't know who that is, your gonna be angry but I think that one girl you hate would be a good you,'
Me- 'Not Debra Messing!?'
Mama- 'No,'
Me- 'Jennifer Garner..'
Mama- 'No, Drew Barrymore,'
Me- 'There goes my right side, thanks,' But to be honest I haven't minded her since seeing Never Been Kissed, very relatable,'What about Tina Fey? Or I know, Micheal Cera in a wig,'

Which is what we decided on. Micheal Cera in a wig. That's me. Its funny, in a not really way, because all the girls in my Geo class are in love with him and I'm like 'baby, I'm right here!'

Then again one of the girls in that class is this chick, Mogunda (It wants me to put Mohandas), and she just shaved half her head and dies it all black, after bleach blec blond. Her parents seriously screwed up. If I was named that I'd go Brittany on myself too.

I think I fell in love with Bernie today. We walk through the hallways and this boy in an unbelievably bright jacket, neon orange, walks into her. She says,'Watch it highlighter!' Then when we get to the orchestra room, which for some reason always smell like guilt and rosin and boredom this goes down...

We see a girl getting her instrument in the back room and Bernie calls out this,'Hey your in my choir class right? Your names Paula?'
Paula- 'I sit next to Stefanie'
Bernie- 'I didn't ask where you sat, I asked your name, it's Destiny right?'
Destiny- 'Its Mellisa,'
Me- 'Lets go now,'

I seriously expected her to say 'you know what they have in Arizona, steers and queers and you ain't got a set of horns so you must be a queer. Then Richard Gear would say something he shouldn't. But no such luck.

Hilary invited me to spend the night Saturday and it may be the first sleepover I've had alone with a girl for 2 years that wasn't Isadora.

Remember Tim? The one who randomly said he had a pretty boyfriend, but apparently meant to say he had a guy friend. The one with the Pauly D hair and who's shirt always matches the laces on his shoes. Oh right! That one.
Yeah well today Ms.Heels picked up a planner, the free ones with a cheap motivational poem on it, and looked to see who's it was. As she was opening the cover Tim kind groaned and went, 'Na.' But she kept going and then she smiled and asked if we know a Shakira. Tim took it and sullenly sat down, but he's not really making up for the fact that he said he has a bf (Specs- O, two f's is friend, one is boyfriend, geez) by writing This Planner Belongs to Shakira in his stuff.

It was like that one time there was a comb on the floor in English and this boy, Bernard, reached down and stuck it in his pocket and then told us he would keep it safe and return it to the owner tomorrow.

Or even the time Korola had quotes all over her binder and each one had her name under it. I told her she didn't say those things and she told me they were by anonymous, so why not be by her.

I love how even facebook is like,'Go get some more friends, we know this column isn't filled with people you know, these people are strangers, but were just trying to help you,'

I have added another person to my love list. And it isn't a women or a youtuber, its Justin Long. Which if you think about it, isn't that much better then a youtuber or a girl. And I was going to make my Mama so proud.

Okay, I'll go now. Because you know I have party planning and friends to do stuff with and stuff...


PS-There is a website for celebrity heights and this guy photo shops himself into pictures with them. How creepy are you, like what level on the creep-o-meter, when you do stuff like that.