March 9, 2011

Testing again. And a broken violin string. And sleep.

So I am going to let you in on one vital piece of information about middle school.

It defies the law's that singing, hot pink, high school movies try to instill. And it goes against everything your mother has ever written on a note and left in your lunch.

But here it is.

Middle school is a food chain in which no rabbit protests the mountain lions.

It's simple, and cruel, but after a while, your place is your place. And any disturbance is annoying, aggravating.

When you see two of the most popular boys at school at table one, you don't cheer for love and equality, you complain. Because, as I've probably made clear, change is the kryptonite of Jr. high.

I saw Hannie today with her hair curled and in cute low pigtails and I nearly broke a blood vessel. As did Issy. This is going to sound mean, but it's like seeing the nerd get a hair cut with really cute bangs. You can't help but think, that's wrong, I don't want you to look like that, she doesn't deserve that. Go back to being ugly.

Maybe your thinking it's only people at my invisible level, not a loner, not a dork, that think this. You'd be incorrect. Band geeks don't nudge in to the wrong conversations and the only living nerd I know who has ever tried to make small talk with popular people is Specs. So lesson learned, no sane person messes with the delicate balance you are set into in the 6th grade. 

 Maybe it's because you become so used to your part in the system when it's moved, even slightly, like Spec's no longer really talking to me, getting new friends, traveling in groups, that you can't help but feel like you're lacking something.

Makeovers don't happen and pulling out your pony tail and taking off your glasses doesn't make you a Plastic, it makes you incredibly naive.

You can scold me, but I don't choose to get sucked in by the status quo of 8th grade. It happens, and then you live. And you keep your head down in the hallways, and you ask the nerds to help you on the computer, and you smile at the popular people only when smiled to.

And you can't imagine it any other way.

So don't try to mess up the flow and oh...don't wear Crocs.