March 27, 2011

Long time, no bloggity.
I think I've lost my mojo. What mojo do you speak of?
I wish something glamorous and crazy had happened, but no, the Ellen shows just gonna have to wait.

There's this poster in my world Geo room that says,'Smiling means the same thing in every language.' And then it has a gorilla smiling on it, which I guess is beside the point, despite how well it explains my teacher. If there's one thing I hate, it's motivational posters. With birds flying in a perfect V, and cute kittens saying 'Arr matey!' and different colors of hands shaking. Do I have a reason? Sure. Do I need a reason? No, I hate them.
But the point is, the poster is a lie. (Just like all the others, 'Yes it will matter how I wore my hair!) A smile in one country means happiness, or that you're around someone and your supposed to look happy. In other places, for all we know, it could simply be threatening, like baring your teeth! We have no idea because we're to busy writing motivational statements and photo-shopping smiles onto gorillas.

You know what? That wasn't even my point. My real, real point was that even the simplest things can be interpreted different ways. A high five to you? An excited,'Way to go!' To me? An excuse to make physical contact....

 You'll thank me later-

Your welcome = I didn't want to, but I did because I'm trying on good person for a try, and I got angry that I ended up doing it, so I had to have the last word.

Your cute = I want to pinch your cheeks and at the same time add ie to the end of anything I call you

You look pretty today = You didn't look that great yesterday.

I missed you over the weekend = Please tell me you didn't do anything worthwhile or fun, because I ate 2 pints too many of rocky road and I need some back up.

I love your shoes = Couldn't think of anything else to compliment.

You kinda look like a drag queen = You kinda look like a drag queen

 On Thursday me and Bernie were walking down the hall and she complained about how when she walked she felt way too jiggly (I always feel so jiggly, it sucks! = Look at my breasts right now, look they're bigger then yours!) and I mentioned that whenever I walked my hair always bounced unnaturally, making me look a lot like Cassie, the head cheerleader. Which lead my English teacher to compare me to a pigeon. And later she told her entire 2nd period, not my class, that if they saw me they should ask me what I know about pigeons. All that day and then the next people have been coming up to me in the halls, in the library, everywhere! Popular people....nerds...my friends.

Ms.Heels signed all of chamber of secrets up for some fundraiser called Tea With Belle that's happening before one of the showings of Beauty and the Beast. I guess there's going to be desserts, tea, etiquette lessons, and other stuff, and all while in a dress, skirt or costume. Unfortunately she asked us after the programs were printed, so I have no choice but to look forward to it.

I babysat this weekend, from 3:30 to 11, my 7 year old next door neighbor. She's gotten a lot better about being annoying and bratty, and a little bit like a mini Specs. But she got over it, and I suppose there will forever be only one Specs. Which I think deserves a celebration.

This morning I woke up feeling like scorpions were crawling all over me and as though I had only been asleep 5 minutes. I guess that's what you get for spending your weekend at the Jersey Shore. I'll know for next time.

I hope you have a pigeon free day, and remember in middle school resistance is futile. Do you see a t-shirt out of that?